Managing the career and financial impacts of family caregiving

Simultaneously looking after aging parents and your kids isn’t easy. If you’re a member of the so-called “sandwich generation”, you may find yourself facing a number of different pressures [link to other sandwich generation article].

Let’s focus on two in particular – financial pressures and career challenges – and how to cope with them.

Financial Pressures

Supporting two generations can be a big financial strain.

To begin with, there’s dual caregiving costs. On one side, you have childcare expenses. Depending on the age of your kids, that could include daycare, extracurricular activities, or post-secondary education. On the other side, there’s eldercare, including health and community services not covered by OHIP (more than you might think).

As a result, you may deplete your savings and/or take on more debt.

This can force you into making tough financial choices. For instance, helping to pay for your parents’ care could potentially mean less money for your kids’ education or your retirement.

And if you have to reduce work hours or leave your job to accommodate caregiving responsibilities, you could lose wages, benefits, or retirement savings.

Case Example

Let’s take Magda as an example. She’s a 45-year-old marketing manager who has two teenage daughters, ages 13 and 16. Her 78-year-old mother recently moved in with her after being diagnosed with dementia. Between managing her daughters’ school activities and her mother’s doctor’s appointments, Magda feels she’s stretched to the limit.

She’s had to reduce her hours at work to part-time, losing benefits like dental insurance and her company’s retirement contribution. With her mother’s care needs increasing, she’s now paying out of pocket for a part-time caregiver to assist while she’s at work, which further stretches her budget. Because of these caregiving responsibilities, Magda cannot attend professional development conferences or take on new projects, limiting her chances of advancement in her company.

Financially, Magda worries about affording her daughters’ university tuition in the future, and she has barely saved for her own retirement. The stress from balancing both personal and professional life has started affecting her performance at work, and she’s afraid of losing her job entirely.

Coping with Financial Pressures and the Stress that Comes with Them

It may sound like Magda is trapped. But even though certain aspects of her situation are beyond her control, she can still take proactive steps to manage her stress.

For instance, she asked her brother, who lives nearby, to help with weekend caregiving.

This allows her to regain some work-life balance.

She also started attending a caregiver support group, where she received emotional support and practical advice from others going through similar situations.

With the help of a financial planner, Magda set up a retirement plan and began investigating scholarships and bursaries to help her daughters with university costs.

Career Challenges

Competing caregiving responsibilities can also have an impact on your career.

Career breaks or reduced work hours: Taking time off or reducing hours to care for loved ones can lead to missed promotions, stagnation in career growth, or loss of skills and professional connections.

Workplace inflexibility: Lack of flexible hours or remote work options can make it difficult to meet the demands of caregiving, leading to burnout or forced career changes.

Stunted career advancement: When caregiving duties take priority, career goals, further education, and professional development are often postponed, limiting long-term advancement opportunities.

High stress and burnout: Juggling work and caregiving can increase stress, which negatively affects job performance and overall well-being.

Case Example

To illustrate, let’s consider Belal, a 52-year-old project engineer.

He has a 20-year-old son attending community college and an 82-year-old father who recently suffered a stroke, leaving him partially paralyzed. Belal and his wife had been helping their son with tuition and living expenses during community college, but much of that financial support is now being redirected to cover his father’s medical care, in-home care, and rehabilitation costs that aren’t covered by OHIP.

Belal’s job requires frequent travel, but after his father’s stroke, he requested a local position with fewer hours to manage both his father’s care and the financial strain. This, however, came with a salary cut, making it even more difficult to cover the family’s expenses. His reduced work hours have affected his job performance, and he fears losing future opportunities for advancement. Despite these efforts, the financial pressure of supporting both his son’s education and his father’s healthcare has led to growing debt and the depletion of savings.

To make matters worse, Belal’s son is now more financially dependent on him than anticipated, as the son has limited time for part-time work due to his academic commitments. Belal feels caught between wanting to provide for his son’s education and ensuring his father receives proper medical care. The financial strain has caused tension in the family, and Belal often feels overwhelmed by guilt, worrying that he’s not doing enough for either generation. Meanwhile, his health has begun to suffer as stress from juggling caregiving and career demands has taken its toll.

Career Coping Strategies

Here’s how Belal has coped.

First of all, he accessed his company’s employee assistance program (EAP) after discovering it provides caregiving resources, counseling, and financial planning support.

He adjusted his career expectations. He accepted that his career had to slow down temporarily due to his caregiving duties. However, he stayed engaged by taking short online courses and maintaining professional networks so that when his caregiving demands lessen, he can resume career growth.

He talked openly with his son about the family’s financial situation, encouraging him to be more independent by taking on part-time work and managing his own expenses.

This conversation, while difficult, helped set realistic expectations for his son while easing some of Belal’s financial stress.

Summing Up

Being a member of the sandwich generation may mean facing difficult decisions that can have long-term impacts on your career, financial stability, and personal well-being.

At first, it may seem like there’s no way out. But in fact, there are a variety of coping strategies you can use. While these strategies may not solve your problems, they can help reduce some of the stress you’re experiencing.